--- title: "A Mistake Many Make when facing the dreaded \"I don't wanna...\" feelings" description: "It can be all too easy to succumb to the \"I don't wanna...\" feelings\n\nEither pushing through or ignoring can create problems\n\nHow about another way?" image: https://www.kouroshdini.com/hubfs/Imported_Blog_Media/Mistakes-with-22I-dont-wanna22-1.png --- ![burger-icon](https://www.kouroshdini.com/hubfs/icons/burger-icon.svg) [![Kourosh Dini - Homepage](https://www.kouroshdini.com/hubfs/logos/kourosh-logo.svg)](https://www.kouroshdini.com) ![close-icon](https://www.kouroshdini.com/hubfs/icons/close-icon.svg) - [Blog page](https://www.kouroshdini.com/the-dini-group-ltd-blog) - [Podcast page](https://www.kouroshdini.com/podcast) - [Music page](https://www.kouroshdini.com/music) - [Courses & Books page](https://www.kouroshdini.com/courses-and-books) - [Psychoanalysis page](https://www.kouroshdini.com/psy) - [About page](https://www.kouroshdini.com/about) - [Contact page](https://www.kouroshdini.com/contact) - [Waves of Focus page](https://www.kouroshdini.com/waves-of-focus) ![Search](https://www.kouroshdini.com/hubfs/icons/search-icon.svg) [![at-icon](https://www.kouroshdini.com/hubfs/icons/at-icon.svg)](mailto:kmdini@gmail.com) [Return to Blog](https://www.kouroshdini.com/the-dini-group-ltd-blog) # A Mistake Many Make when facing the dreaded "I don't wanna..." feelings Apr 03, 2023 ![](https://www.kouroshdini.com/hubfs/Imported_Blog_Media/Mistakes-with-22I-dont-wanna22-1.png) It can be all too easy to succumb to the "I don't wanna..." feelings Either pushing through or ignoring can create problems How about another way? --- Some struggle with the sense that they cannot act unless the interest to do it is already there. They cannot do things they don't want, despite their importance. Feelings of "I don't wanna..." often win, taking them hostage. Scientific terminology can, paradoxically, strengthen this sentiment. Terms like "Dysfunctional executive function skills", "emotional dysregulation", "dopamine" and "prefrontal cortex" can leave us feeling lost. While we can study the terms, they all remain distant from lived experience, perhaps accessible only by some hoped for scientist's tools. With such phrases echoing throughout social media, it can be easy to feel crushed under the weight of seeming inability. Trained as a psychiatrist, but more so a psychoanalyst, I tend to have a different perspective: \*\*Our emotions have meaning.\*\* Emotions are not just things to poke and prod with sterilized words. They are not just things in our way. They are not things we only have too much or too little of. They are not soft and squishy. They are the winds and waters by which we sail our conscious lives. And quite vitally, we can feel them for ourselves. "I don't wanna...". often carries many feelings behind it. Exhaustion and frustration might be a couple. Beyond those however, there are often many stories of depth and detail, moments more meaningful than they at first appear. Whether taking out the garbage or making a major decision as a company leader, emotions are the sources by which we engage. Rather than wait for an ephemeral "Now, I feel like it...", we can at least show up to the event. We can bring ourselves to the garbage, we can put options of a heavy decision in front of us, or we can bring the work or play within arms reach and then \*\*simply be\*\*. It is \*\*in that being\*\* with the stuff that the winds and waters begin to stir, in all their natural nuance. From there, we can decide. \- Kourosh PS. All videos of the \*Waves of Focus Basics\* course are now uploaded. I'm now building out the membership components, along with exercises and the like. 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