It can be far too easy to lose ourselves in productivity.
“I need to do more!”
Or our body finally collapses to say,
“No more!”
Somewhere along the way, we might find ourselves with self-accusations of laziness. Maybe if we were harder on ourselves, we’d finally get moving?
Dr. Fuschia Sirois, a professor of social and health psychology at Durham University, suggests that self-compassion may be a better approach. In our recent Rhythms of Focus podcast discussion, Dr. Sirois and I explored the intricate relationship between emotion, self-compassion, and procrastination.
Procrastination is about avoiding an emotion. Something about the task, the intention, reeks. When we call ourselves “lazy”, we “get to” avoid that experience at the cost of self-esteem. While it is hardly a good purchase, the unconscious voices speaking through emotion can throw us off better judgement.
Dr. Sirois makes a strong case for our social normal and their relationship to our internalized expectations of what constitutes being a “good” or “productive” member of society as being a factor.
A Call for Self-Compassion
One of the highlights of Dr. Sirois’s research is her emphasis on self-compassion. Self-compassion isn’t merely about being kind to ourselves when things go wrong but involves truly accepting our humanity—understanding that mistakes and failures are a part of life. In the podcast, she discussed the concept of self-compassion being activated in moments of struggle, where facing our shortcomings allows this powerful sentiment to move us forward.
Cultural Influences on Self-Compassion
The conversation also touched upon how cultural backgrounds can influence our levels of self-compassion. Citing research comparing various countries, Dr. Sirois noted how cultural norms around productivity and self-worth can shape our internal dialogues and responses. In cultures with strong productivity norms, people are often less self-compassionate.
But what are we even discussing when it comes to “productivity,” a word that can rapidly become meaningless. Here, we consider it as the demand of the concrete – the thing that must be delivered, in this way, by this date, with these steps, or in this form. Contrast this with the creative – in which we do not know what we are making except for its discovery in the act of making it.
How do we create the conditions that nourish creativity in this way? Could we improve our ability to engage work, but do so with resiliency and even a better sense of individual and collective meaning in the meantime?
- Kourosh
PS Check out the latest Rhythms of Focus episode here.
