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Finding a Way Forward When “I Just Don’t Wanna”

Finding a Way Forward When “I Just Don’t Wanna”

“I don’t wanna” feelings can hit strong.

Not only when trying to do work but sometimes even with those things we’d normally enjoy.

One psychiatrist, Dr. William Dodson, described several emotions that can help us engage:

1. Challenge
2. Interest
3. Novelty
4. Urgency
5. Passion

Together, we can remember these, as one student had suggested, as the “CHIN-UP” emotions.

The idea is that if we can find one of these emotions within our work, we have a better chance of moving forward.

Great. Problem solved, right?

Likely not. Let’s take a closer look.

Why do these emotions work?

Together, they represent emotions of the Now, where we feel things as present and real, at least in some primal, foundational sense of being alive.

While rationally, we might encourage ourselves by saying we “should be” interested in something or create a false deadline to invoke urgency, neither method works.

I have never won an argument with an emotion. If I did, “snap out of it” and “just start” would work, and I’d be out of business as a psychiatrist.

Still, our ability to create an image in mind of what is different-than-the-Now is one of humanity’s greatest strengths.

But it is between our depths of emotion and powers of vision, where we can begin creating the bridges from where we are to where we want to be.

When challenged, we are neither over- nor under-stimulated. In between, we can find a Window of Challenge and possibly the start of a session.

When interested, we may already see that Window of Challenge, a tendril of growth and play ready to emerge.

Novelty offers discovery. But it is what we bring with ourselves from the past that gives the novel its shine. We look for the patterns we know and see where they fit with the patterns we are now encountering.

Urgency involves a threat of loss under the pressure of time. Some may deliberately delay until this emotion reaches a fervor. I much prefer to avoid this route when possible due to its stressful and unpredictable nature.

Passion is about nurturing play’s momentum, engaged in a rhythm of days. Whether in an infancy of a few weeks or in a prime of twenty years, we can develop ways to garden and strengthen that passion over time, by creating bridges between the Now and the Not Now.

Thankfully, a Visit-based approach to work can offer not only exactly that, but a means of measuring and and maybe even dosing each of these emotions.

– Kourosh

PS Consider learning how to better engage the CHIN-UP emotions to help you not only get through your days, but to get to the things that matter to you most. You can start with the Waves of Focus, a Visit-based system to help the powerful wandering mind and engage with an honesty of self. Download the first module for free here.

What is Productivity?

Productivity is many things. For some, it is about doing a lot in a little time.
But, truly, productivity is so much more. It is about:

  • Setting yourself up for success.
  • Being focused where you want to be.
  • Doing things that you find meaningful.
  • Being creative, sometimes even in harsh environments.
  • Forging your own paths.
  • Finding your voice and delivering it well.
  • Knowing and actively deciding on your obligations.
  • Knowing where and how to say “no”.
  • Avoiding procrastination.

Too often, many of us fall into just going along with and fighting whatever the world throws at us. “Go with the flow!”, we say. Meanwhile, we might think, “I’d like to do that one thing. Maybe one day I will.” The days go by. The goal never arrives, and then we wonder why or blame circumstance.

But when we learn to take charge of our lives and the world
around us, we start living life with intention.

“I should do that,” becomes “This is how I start”. Deliberately forging a path to our goals and dreams, we figure out what we want in life and then start taking steps there.

Of course, striking out may seem scary. It takes courage to live life with purpose and on purpose. Roadblocks and worries, fears and concerns show up everywhere.

This is my passion. I want to help you to find that sense of your own unique play to meet the world so that you can:

  • Create a life that is yours.
  • Find and follow an inner guide in a way that works for you and those you care for.
  • Decide on your obligations and meet them while building the world you want.

Productivity Journal

The Act of Patience

Beyond virtue, patience is a skill:

 

Patience is the skill to allow and accommodate for a process to develop at its own pace.

 

Patience is not waiting for something. Patience is a type of organizing that respects the development of the environment and the self. Waiting is only one component, an action of inaction, in that constellation.

We reflect upon some intention, acknowledge its needs of material, mentation, and time, and begin to accommodate for them. Each component in turn is provided its nutrients until some vision unfolds.

read more

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